I am somewhat obsessed with recreating my favorite snack cakes at home. I think the homemade Twinkies and Zingers at Angel Food Bakery are what started it. Me? I was always an oatmeal cream pie girl. I never passed on a Star Crunch or a Zebra Cake, but if mom came home with these things my sister and brother and I would hurry up and at as many as we could, each of us convinced that the other sibling was going to get more than we did. They never, ever made it into my lunch. This recipe supposedly makes 12 sandwiches (24 cookies) but I got a ton more than that, even with Teno eating the raw dough by the spoon full. I might do a batch and a half of filling next time, though. Mostly because I want to get even sicker than I did today eating two of these and chasing it with pizza and diet cherry Pepsi.

For the cookies you will need:

  • 1 cup margarine or butter
  • 3/4 cup dark brown sugar
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1 tablespoon molasses
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla
  • fave replacer for 2 eggs
  • 1 1/2 cups flour
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1/8 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 1 1/2 cups quick oats

For the cream filling you will need:

  • 2 teaspoons very hot water
  • 1/4 teaspoon salt
  • 7 oz ricemellow cream (vegan marshmallow fluff)
  • 1/2 cup shortening
  • 1/3 cup powdered sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon vanilla

Then you:

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees. Cream margarine, sugars, molasses, vanilla, and egg replacer in a medium bowl. In a small bowl, combine flour, salt, baking soda and cinnamon. Add the flour mixture to the wet ingredients and mix in the oats. Drop dough by the tablespoonful onto ungreased sheets. (I lined mine with parchment paper.) Bake for 10-12 minutes,or until just starting to brown around the edges. They won’t look “finished” but don’t overcook them, you want them chewy.

In small bowl, dissolve the salt in the hot water. I have no idea why. That’s just what the old timey recipe I found said to do. Allow this to cool.
Combine ricemellow cream, shortening, powdered sugar, and vanilla in med bowl; mix on high until fluffy. Add the cooled salt water and mix well. Again, why? I have no idea.

Spread filling on flat side of one cookie, press 2nd cookie on top.

Nutritional info: Horrendous. Unspeakable. Give as many away as you possibly can. Give them to people you hate so they die of heart attacks. Share one with someone you love because they’re delicious, and half might not kill you.